Pitbull is Sad.

For those of you who don't know, I kinda love (read: OB.SESSED.)  Jenna Marbles. She's basically my Internet-friend (who doesn't know me yet), and I'm determined to figure out a way to get her to come to my birthday party this fall (more on that later).

But, EVERY time I am sad, I find my self saying "Pitbull is sad..."

Mainly in reference to this video that I think is hysterical:

I'm not going to get into the details of WHY I am sad (I know, that is so mean. It's like telling you I have a secret and not sharing. Sorry kids, not everything is for the Internets. Sometimes a little time and perspective does a body good).

BUT - do not fear! Instead I have something better!

For the Love of Climbing

Have you ever loved something, but somehow managed to forget that you love it?

Like you think, "oh yeah, I really like that thing" but then your life gets away from you, and a year goes by before you ever think of it again? And then you reconnect with it and your like "OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING WHY DO I NOT SPEND MY WHOLE LIFE DOING THIS EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY!?"

This is me and climbing.

Last night I went climbing for the first time in about 8 months, and it basically made me feel like this:

I used to climb aalllll the time. I wasn't some amazing climber, but I had a group of friends who loved it, so instead of "happy hours" we'd meet to at the gym and do some routes. I'd go several times a week. And then one of my friends got really into lead climbing/sport/trad, and could take us majestical places like Joshua Tree or Malibu Creek and we'd scramble around outdoors.

At The Beginning.

The 18th of this month marks the 4-year date-a-versary for Steve and I.

It was four years ago that I drank too much and sat on his lap to let him know I was interested. That he asked me on a date. That he drove 100 miles that night to drive from LA to Huntington Beach to pick me up, to Hollywood for the date, and then all the way home. That he told me this story about his first car that he had to parked under a tree with a bee hive, and sap and bees were constantly stuck all over his powder blue Camry. That I laughed so hard I snorted. That he bought me 2 beers because he didn't know which one I wanted. Four years since I sat in a seat in a small private concert and realized "Ohmygod, I think I might marry this man."

It was destiny. lol.

I cannot even begin to get my brain around that number.

I know it's not the longest two people have been together. It's not even a dent in the married world (it's been eighteen months married).

But four years is the longest time I have ever been connected to another soul. Four years ago I was twenty-five, and when I look at my now twenty-five year old brother I laugh because I think he is such a baby, and he seems altogether too young.  Or I think about things that have happened "forever ago," and remember that Steve was around, so he is in those memories. It's kinda crazy.

But as we round the corner on four years, I have been discovering something that strikes me as remarkable:

Blur.

I have been sitting in front of my computer for nearly an hour - bouncing back and forth to Pinterest to see if I should do a Pinterest-pins post, and then racking my brains for other things to say.

It's not that I'm out of ideas, it's just that this week has been so fast.

So. Fast.

I honestly thought it was Tuesday, and just found out that the office baby shower that I planned to go to, and the happy hour I was going to stop in at were on Wednesday and Thursday respectively....so I completely missed them.

Apparently today is Friday?

But I promise, this isn't a "I was a busy blogger so Im going to make excuses" post.

I was busy doing some kick ass stuff!

I'm working on a new blog theme for a client, and broke into the CSS stylesheet yesterday to make some customizations.

One of my girlfriends recently gave me a small yogurt making kit, so mid-day and mid-project I decided to try my hand at homemade yogurt. Cause you know, I don't have enough going on.

There was a moment where I was literally stirring my homemade yogurt with one hand, while coding a website with the other.

Watch out Martha Stewart.

Also, I spent like a collective 3 hours this week watching tutorials on book design because the momentum has really started to pick up on my Cookbook Project (OHMYGOD FINALLY). I literally have been working on this for a year, and every step of the way has felt uphill. It is just now that I feel like I am starting to pick up steam, and getting a vision for what I where I am going. It's been painful.

A few things that have helped that have been:

Rent Control and Curtains.

Ok, so you guys who follow me often know that I have the "wanna-buy-a-house" syndrome. It's the way some women look at babies, and you can see it all over their face that they've got the baby bug....I look at "Open House" signs, and swoon.

A few weeks ago, I wrote about this new longing, and about how suddenly hanging curtains seems like a significant and important step in my quest for permanence.

But then this happened:

"Dear Mr. Heffernan and Ms. Heffernan Brown,

We love your continued residency here at the [Insert Apartment Complex Name Here]. As you know, your lease terms are up at the end of May, and we are prepared to offer a re-negotiated rate for your next lease, if you'd decide to resign with us.

We know that a 'one-size-fits-all' approach isn't always accommodating to our residents, so we've broken our pricing based on the number of months you'd sign with us. Take a look at the prices below, and then feel free to stop by the leasing office to discuss your renewal.

1 Month - $4,815.00 --> (I wish this was a gross exaggeration to make you laugh. This is the real number on that paper. PEOPLE PAY THIS. REAL PEOPLE IN LIFE PAY THIS TO LIVE IN AN APARTMENT. My head is literally imploding).

2 Months - $ a little less
3 Months - $ a little less
4 Months - $ a little less
....all the way down a 12 month lease.

You get the idea.

The final number was still outrageous, and then there was a hand written note that said "Since you've been great tenants, we're willing to come down to $XX"

This new "lower price" is still 35% more than we were paying last year to live in the same exact place.

My head is still imploding.

So now we are faced with a new thought.

WE NEED RENT CONTROL.

Triathlon.

For my first wedding anniversary, I bought my husband admission tickets to the Silicon Valley Sprint Triathlon.

Now usually when our friends find out about this, it initiates a series of questions. I will take my liberties to answer them now:

1. Yes, I bought tickets for both of us. We are doing it together.
2. No, neither of us has ever done one before.
3. Yes, when I bought the tickets I was fairly confident that he would actually like it. Similar to the time were I took him surprise skydiving. But that's a different story.
4. Yes, I'm getting very nervous.
5. Yes, the swim is outdoor. It's in a reservoir somewhere in Mountain View.
6. The water temperature is expected to be around 68 degrees.
7. Yes, we plan on looking into renting wetsuits.
8. No, I am not nervous about the swim. I swam competitively, so that is not an issue. The water temperature makes me nervous, but the 1/2 mile swim does not.
9. No, I am not good at biking and yes I am very nervous about it.
10. It's in April.

This past weekend, we decided to give all three legs of the event a trial run. Back-to back-to back, just like in the real event. Since we've never really done this before, we didn't really have the concept of how long a 1/2 mile swim, 16 mile bike ride, and 3 mile run was going to feel. We've been pretty good about training - we go to the gym at 5:30am several mornings a week, run, lift weights, swim, bike, etc. But we've just never done all of these things at once. So, a trial was definitely necessary.

Ok, at the end of this little experiment, this was basically me:

Just a Glimpse.

Last Friday I got an epic call.  The kind of call where as soon as you answer and realize what is happening, instantly your heart is in your throat.

"Hello, is this Jenni Heffernan Brown? This is the had of graduate admissions for USF. I'm just calling to tell you that we were delighted with your application..."

He said a lot more than that, but I heard nothing. Steve and I were too busy jumping up and down on the guest bed.

Later that evening, we'd walked a half-mile in the rain to celebrate over a cocktail. We'd picked out a new bar that some of our friends keep telling us we need to try. It's relaxed, and slightly swanky, and sophisticated without making you feel dumb for not knowing all of the ingredients on the menu.

As I sat at the table staring out into the rain, I had one thought that repeated in my mind over and over.

"If the twenty-four year old Jenni could have just a glimpse of this moment....would she even believe it?"

Let me paint you a little picture of who I was remembering:

At twenty-four I was dating someone who I almost was engaged to. I want to say this with as many asterisks and disclaimers as I can mention, simply because I know now that I most likely would not have gone through with it. 

He was a person I had met while living overseas, and we'd both found the process of re-acclimating to our North American lives more difficult than we'd anticipated. In those first few weeks of being back in our respective countries, I would often find him chatting online late at night. Neither of us could sleep, and chatting with different time zones seemed to ease the anxiety of being awake while the darkness slept.

As you can imagine, chatting turned into  more chatting, which turned into phone calls, which turned into visits. It was on one of these visits, while he and I were sitting in a darkened movie theatre, that he leaned over to me and whispered "Do you want to be my girlfriend?"